What Have You Just Seen... Marks Out of 5

grim_tales · Post by **grim_tales** » 04 Jun 2007, 16:49

Sleepy Hollow is very good

gasteropod · Post by **gasteropod** » 04 Jun 2007, 17:10

I don't like Tim Burton films, I like Johnny Depp in The Ninth Gate.

Lourdes · Post by **Lourdes** » 04 Jun 2007, 18:57

Sleepy Hollow - 2/5
It's alright the first time but now it just seems meh. I don't much like Burton.

Heroes - 7/10
By TV standards this is pretty damn good, entertaining throughout. I don't see myself watching any more however, towards the end it became somewhat of a clusterfuck.

EvaUnit02 · Post by **EvaUnit02** » 04 Jun 2007, 20:33

Sleepy Hollow is a very meh film, easily amongst Burton's worst.

grim_tales · Post by **grim_tales** » 04 Jun 2007, 20:39

Beetle Juice was very good too, great fun

EvaUnit02 · Post by **EvaUnit02** » 04 Jun 2007, 20:42

Ed Wood is easily his best.

Markgway · Post by **Markgway** » 04 Jun 2007, 23:17

I thought Sleepy Hollow was fun, a tongue-in-cheek pastiche of Hammer Horror. It's not a great movie, the story is too convoluted for a start, but I found it to be entertaining, and Depp's very English constable amuses.

As for Burton's best? I'd say Edward Scissorhands. He put his soul into that one.

degeneration · Post by **degeneration** » 05 Jun 2007, 17:31

I've liked most of Tim burton's films, although not watched planet of the apes yet and somehow not got round to Corpse Bride, but I like different ones a lot for different reasons.

Beetlejuice was just brilliant dark fun!
Batman i really liked too. Easily the best of that load of batman films.
Edward Scissorhands was a great fairytale style film, but something about it made me not think it was amazing.
Mars Attacks! had some brilliant humour in it! I laughed my ass off with this one.
Sleepy Hollow - think I'll go with what Mark said. It was good, gory at times, fun, and quite tongue in cheek for the genre.
Big Fish had outstanding "fantasy story" bits. The imaginary world sequences were among the best stuff I think I've seen from Burton, but the real world stuff didn't live up to the rest of the film.
And I really liked Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Thought it was quirky, weird and fun!

Markgway · Post by **Markgway** » 05 Jun 2007, 23:25

Mars Attacks! didn't work for me. I just didn't get it the same I did some others.

Knetan · Post by **Knetan** » 06 Jun 2007, 19:06

hey,

Kung Fu Vampire 1/5

Mainland lensed hopping vampire movie by Yuen Cheung-yan who manages to drain all the momentum and fun out of the genre. A genre that wasn't blooming as such anymore by this time though.

Kickboxer From Hell 1.5/5

IFD strikes again, this time letting go off the ninjas and instead cutting and spicing, working from a 70s Japanese horror flick of doubtful quality. Mark Houghton stars in IFD's own footage. It's so bad beyond belief (and the f-bombs fly like crazy to hilarious effect) that I'm almost ready to proclaim IFD to be geniuses. You certainly must intend to make something this bad. You can't BE this bad. Or perhaps you can. I had fun partly nonetheless.

Bloody Money 1.5/5

83 Chow Yun-Fat flick and while far from his worst pre-fame (the hilarious Pursuit probably earns that spot), this light and dark melodrama (it doesn't know what to be until very late) registers as limp in most every department.

gasteropod · Post by **gasteropod** » 06 Jun 2007, 21:37

I see you've been watching some good films lately, Knetan

Markgway · Post by **Markgway** » 06 Jun 2007, 21:48

THE CARD PLAYER 3.5/5

Something of a return to form for Dario Argento after over a decade of rubbish. Decent acting (I especially liked Stefania Rocca), a plot that makes some sense (even if the dialogue is, as always, stilted), and mystery and suspense instead of too-typical blood and guts. Indeed, most of the complaints I've heard about this film are that it isn't bloody enough in the ways of Opera and Sleepless, never mind the fact that those films were absolute pants in almost every other department. This is a "mainstream" (oops, I used a dirty word) thriller and not a compilation of nasty deaths, so if that's what you expect look elsewhere. Personally I liked it a lot more than I thought I would. Maybe there's some life in the old dog yet...?

Knetan · Post by **Knetan** » 06 Jun 2007, 21:57

gasteropod wrote:I see you've been watching some good films lately, Knetan

Gotta go by gut instinct and IFD-presented movies especially can prove to be a whole lot of fun. Not only their cut and splice projects but stuff like GOLDEN QUEENS COMMANDO as well. It's ok to allow trash-films to own you.

Early Chow Yun-Fat stuff is mostly crap, aside from the likes of Story Of Woo Viet (which I just got hold of on laserdisc) but there's low-grade fun to be had out of those too, especially the mentioned PURSUIT.

Knetan · Post by **Knetan** » 07 Jun 2007, 20:42

hey,

Red Spell Spells Red 2/5

Horror set in Borneo mostly and accompanied by some "morally upright" gruesome sights eventually. Scorpions crawling out of wounds, leaves sticking hard enough to facial skin that it rips it off, copious amount of animal cruelty (a chicken is eaten alive at one point). "Fun" for all.

Markgway · Post by **Markgway** » 08 Jun 2007, 01:15

Knetan wrote:Scorpions crawling out of wounds, leaves sticking hard enough to facial skin that it rips it off, copious amount of animal cruelty (a chicken is eaten alive at one point).

Aren't you glad you skipped that Jamie Luk film?

Knetan · Post by **Knetan** » 08 Jun 2007, 04:57

hey,

I had fun.

grim_tales · Post by **grim_tales** » 08 Jun 2007, 09:28

Jackie Chan's The Protector - 1.5/5

Didn't like it. Felt like a cheesy US film that just happened to have Jackie Chan in it. The acting and script is mediocre though ironically at times this can be funny ("Give me da fucking keeys!"), for some reason the dialogue sounded like it was dubbed even though its an English film.
Swearing and gratuitous nudity abound feel really out of place in a Jackie film too, some of the fights were OK and are welcome relief (Mars was a choreographer I believe) though nowhere Jackie's best work. Plus the end fight is too protracted and drawn out.
The villain Cole (sp?) looked familliar - who is he?

Maid Marian and Her Merry Men - 3.5/5

The first episode is not the best but still funny. You'll be singing the theme tune in no time!

EvaUnit02 · Post by **EvaUnit02** » 08 Jun 2007, 10:03

grim_tales wrote: The villain Cole (sp?) looked familliar - who is he?

USE the fucking IMDB.

50 First Dates - 2.25/5
More like 50 romcom cliches. I found it hard to believe that Adam Sandler could be a womanising vet.

grim_tales · Post by **grim_tales** » 08 Jun 2007, 10:25

Roy Chiao - of course!

Markgway · Post by **Markgway** » 08 Jun 2007, 19:32

...and it's Harold Ko not Cole.

grim_tales · Post by **grim_tales** » 08 Jun 2007, 19:37

Ko, my bad

DangerousLeeHandsome · Post by **DangerousLeeHandsome** » 09 Jun 2007, 04:20

Fantastic Four: Extended Cut - 2.5/5
Hated the original; only gave it 1/5. This new extended cut doesn't really get drastically better. The dialog still sucks; the acting still sucks; the action still sucks. But I do admire that it takes its time to let the story and characters develop instead of rushing everything and cramming it into 100 mins. For the effort, I give FF: Extended 2.5/5.

grim_tales · Post by **grim_tales** » 09 Jun 2007, 09:32

Maid Marian and Her Merry Men - Episodes 2 and 3: 4/5

Cleverly the stories in the series do actually take bits n' pieces from the "real" Medieval Robin Hood stories (the Little John fight on the bridge, King John trying to trap Robin by holding an archery tournament). Barrington (Danny John Jules) is pure class and very funny

As King John, Forbes Collins does seem a bit like Richard IV in Blackadder (ie a raving nutter who shouts a lot). Tony Robinson is great too, the "Game Called John" episode is funny, in an effort to make King John famous the sherrif invents a new game and wonders what to call it, the payoff at the end being that the peasants name isn't Stinker but Snooker.

BiscLimpkit · Post by **BiscLimpkit** » 09 Jun 2007, 09:54

Maaaaarian!
Why don't you, caaaaaarry on
with what you're, doooooooooing
Cause there's always trouble, brewwwwing
You've got to, fiiiind a way
to make a, beeeetter day
Oooh Maaarian!!! 8)

Used to love that show.

grim_tales · Post by **grim_tales** » 09 Jun 2007, 10:01

See, I told you you'd be singing the theme in no time!!

Great show!