Give me your worst asian movies

tom2681 · Post by **tom2681** » 30 Jan 2007, 20:26

I'm looking for movies that I will actually enjoy.

So: name me your worst asian movies. I'm talking about movies that are so bad they make you want to throw up just thinking about them.
Give me your Dream of a Warrior, your DevilMan, your Casshern and your Lorelei. I'll love them all !

I'd prefer Korean / Japanese movies, but I'm up for terrible Hong-Kong stuff too (Twins Effect 2, anyone ?).

What are the worst asian films you've ever seen ?
A top 3 or top 10 will do nicely.

bradavon · Post by **bradavon** » 30 Jan 2007, 20:43

Drunken Master

, seriously it's more boring than Citizen Kane and that's boring

. It's probably more it not being my style than anything else though.

I'm sure there are more.

BiscLimpkit · Post by **BiscLimpkit** » 30 Jan 2007, 20:54

Conduct Zero aka No Manners (Korean)
Ichi-1 (Japanese)
A Blue Automobile (Japanese)
Jam Films S (Japanese)
Battle Royale II (Japanese)

I'd be surprised if you hate any of the above.

tom2681 · Post by **tom2681** » 30 Jan 2007, 20:55

Already know (and love) Battle Royale 2 and Conduct Zero.
Haven't seen the others yet, thanks.

bradavon · Post by **bradavon** » 30 Jan 2007, 20:57

I enjoyed BR2 more on a second viewing, it's not as bad IMO if you don't compare it to the original. It's on the same level as The Transporter. VERY dumb action film.

BiscLimpkit · Post by **BiscLimpkit** » 30 Jan 2007, 21:01

tom2681 wrote:Already know (and love) Battle Royale 2 and Conduct Zero.
Haven't seen the others yet, thanks.

Hey no problem. Lemme know if I can help you out further. I have a JPN R2 of A Blue Automobile for sale/trade.

HungFist · Post by **HungFist** » 30 Jan 2007, 21:37

Nowhere To Hide
Gogoe
The Swamp
Rob-B-Hood
Sakuya: Slayer of Demons
Zero Woman 2
Eijanaika
Zipang
Shabondama Elegy
+ a special mention to Survive Style 5+ as the most over-rated japanese film I've encountered.

tom2681 · Post by **tom2681** » 30 Jan 2007, 21:41

Gogoe

You mean Gojoe, right ?

Thanks for the suggestions.

bradavon · Post by **bradavon** » 30 Jan 2007, 21:45

HungFist wrote:Nowhere To Hide

Don't let Romero here you say that he thinks it's a masterpiece

gasteropod · Post by **gasteropod** » 30 Jan 2007, 22:29

Yesterday
2009: Lost Memories
Seoul Raiders

tom2681 · Post by **tom2681** » 30 Jan 2007, 22:42

Yep. Awesome movies there, thanks.

Yesterday is one of my all-time favorites.

BiscLimpkit · Post by **BiscLimpkit** » 30 Jan 2007, 22:43

Pretty much every HK film made in the last 3 years except the odd gem from Johnnie To.

EvaUnit02 · Post by **EvaUnit02** » 30 Jan 2007, 22:59

Lost in Time
First Strike
When the Last Sword is Drawn
Battle Royale 2
Volcano High
So CloseSome more off the top of head:-
Ju-on
Ringu 2
Naruto Movie 1
Street Fighter Alpha Generations
Final Fantasy 7: Advent Children

EDIT: Meant Battle Royale 2, the first one was great.

bradavon · Post by **bradavon** » 30 Jan 2007, 23:17

I second Volcano High, it was pretty much mostly trash.

Yi-Long · Post by **Yi-Long** » 30 Jan 2007, 23:30

- Supercar Criminals
- Fly me to Polaris
- Crying Heart (Deanny Yip and Tam Yiu Man)
- The Tricky Master

memetic · Post by **memetic** » 30 Jan 2007, 23:30

Some that come to mind... mainly cos a lot of them I saw recently...

Moonlight in Tokyo (HK)
All About Love (HK)
Ghost Train (Japan) - if you pick up <insert "train ticket"> you will die!
Comrade (aka Double Agent) (South Korea)
Winter Sonata (South Korea) - couldn't get past 1st episode bleeargh
Sunflower (China)
Everlasting Regret (HK)
Tachigui: The Amazing Lives of the Fast-Food Grifters (Japan)
Lies (South Korea) - amazing because it's practically porn AND you want to fast-forward through it
Teenage Hooker Became Killing Machine in Daehakroh (South Korea) - it's short but still manages to be booooring

P.S. Funny thread Tom - you seem to be hitting paydirt with the suggestions

tom2681 · Post by **tom2681** » 30 Jan 2007, 23:30

@Brad:
Agreed. I loved every second of it.

So far, the only bad film I've seen in this thread is Nowhere to Hide. All the others are superb.

Lots of good stuff here, guys.
Thanks a lot. That's gonna keep me entertained for a while.

Markgway · Post by **Markgway** » 30 Jan 2007, 23:49

I know you've seen it...... but Battle Royale 2 was so fucking bad I just had to mention it again.

Running on Karma was a steaming pile of poo.

bradavon · Post by **bradavon** » 30 Jan 2007, 23:53

memetic wrote:P.S. Funny thread Tom - you seem to be hitting paydirt with the suggestions

Huh?

tom2681 · Post by **tom2681** » 31 Jan 2007, 00:53

To hit paydirt:
It's an old expression (that probably originated in goldmines in the mid 1800's) that means: to find what you're looking for / to hit the jackpot.

Paydirt = valuable dirt = gold.

Brad: Do you speak english like... at all ?

-------

I've heard lots of bad things about this new japanese blockbuster called Japan Sinks. Maybe I should give it a go.

Kurgan · Post by **Kurgan** » 31 Jan 2007, 01:30

That's pretty fuckin' funny

I actually liked Casshern and Conduct Zero aka No Manners. This realisation always scares me; am I becoming like Tom and going insane?!
But then I settle myself by acknowledging that I hate Twins Effect, which would be a true indicator of lunacy...

memetic · Post by **memetic** » 31 Jan 2007, 05:28

From what I've been hearing Tom, you'll absolutely love The Restless. Like Musa (which I liked) but much much worse... I mean - better!

Blaizeyboy · Post by **Blaizeyboy** » 31 Jan 2007, 11:34

- Wesleys mysterious file
- a chinese odyssey 1- pandora's box
- a chinese odyssey 2- cinderella

that sinking of japan looks pretty decent to me, they've also done a spoof film of it too called, 'everywhere sinks but japan'

thelostdragon · Post by **thelostdragon** » 31 Jan 2007, 11:53

I can't believe to read some of the titles as the WORST Asian films some of you have seen.

Tom, easily any film Ken rates in the "What have you just seen"-thread.

As for my choices:

HK:
Naked Poison 2
American Commando Ninja
Initial D
Manhattan Midnight

Japan:
The Ring

Korea:
A Perfect Match
The Anarchists
Dae Myoung

Shingster · Post by **Shingster** » 31 Jan 2007, 12:22

Pah, I think all the posters in this thread have either not watched nearly enough Asian films or couldn't tell a truly awful film if it slapped them in the face! What I mean is that there are hundreds of really bad zero-budget, horrendously made straight-to-video films across all Asian countries - particularly HK and Japan. In comparison to these, all the titles so far have at least some level of sophistication when it comes to the process of filmmaking, even if the final result is a shite film.