What general film/series have you just seen.. marks out of 5

[Markgway]

[RetroRobot]

From that to this....

[Markgway]

She's still attractive... it's just the 80s businesswoman hairdo.

[grim_tales]

The Lego Movie: 3/5

I wasn't expecting much, but.. I rather enjoyed it. The animation is very clever (hard to believe it's literally animated Lego). Some fun references (Liam Neeson's Good Cop/Bad Cop is hilarious, so is Lego Batman) and the ending was neat and not what I expected.
But then theres that bloody earworm song

[RetroRobot]

Savage Streets- 1984

Pure 80's exploitation sleaze of the grimiest kind, featuring Linda Blair and her glorious tits. Plus more tits, bush, lots of leather attire, crossbow killings, dirty LA street vibe, rape, shower fight and so much more. Im not big on rape scenes, and the one here, featuring an awfully young looking Linnea Quigley is a hard one to watch. But all the other stuff is great fun. I wish Danny Steinmann had directed more flicks. Also love his work on Friday the 13th Part V.

[HungFist]

Savage Streets- 1984

Pure 80's exploitation sleaze of the grimiest kind, featuring Linda Blair and her glorious tits. Plus more tits, bush, lots of leather attire, crossbow killings, dirty LA street vibe, rape, shower fight and so much more. Im not big on rape scenes, and the one here, featuring an awfully young looking Linnea Quigley is a hard one to watch. But all the other stuff is great fun.

One of the best films of the 80's!!!!

Well, ok, maybe there's (quite) a few that are better, but it's still damn good!!!

[RetroRobot]

Yeah, it has it all. For a cool double bill, one should watch it with Class of 1984. And if only the fucknuggets who has the rights to 3:15- Moment of Truth could get their shit together and put that out in a decent format, that would be an awesome triple header.

[Markgway]

Monkey Shines (1988-USA) **
Horror movie from George Romero about a genetically modified killer monkey.
An interesting failure... though the monkey gives the film's best performance.

[RetroRobot]

Is that the one with Elizabeth Shue?

[RetroRobot]

Sorry, I was thinking of Link... also a killer monkey flick.

[Markgway]

Haven't seen Link.

But you can't beat Phenomena's razor-wielding chimp for simian bad-assery.

[RetroRobot]

Blame it on Rio- 1984

I have a certain affection for these "forbidden fruit" comedies like 10, Woman in Red, My Tutor etc.. This one is definitely veering into creepy territory, but when Michelle Johnson gets her tits out, I forget all about my prudishness

[Markgway]

Blame it on Rio- 1984

I have a certain affection for these "forbidden fruit" comedies like 10, Woman in Red, My Tutor etc.. This one is definitely veering into creepy territory, but when Michelle Johnson gets her tits out, I forget all about my prudishness

Saw this a few years back... thought it was funny and, yeah, with Michelle Johnson, I definitely would.

[RetroRobot]

Yes, her sweet rack compensated well for the fact that Demi Moore had no tits whatsoever at this time

And I always like Michael Caine... even when he's bad *COUGH* jaws the revenge *COUGH*

[RetroRobot]

Downloaded a bunch of otherwise not available documentaries from youtube, and ended up watching this one...

Dream Deceivers- 1992

About the two white trash losers that made a suicide pact supposedly inspired by the DEMONIC lyrics of Judas Priest back in the mid 80's. One kid died, the other one just blew half his face off with a shotgun and ended up looking like a discarded muppet, and obviously their god fearing, church going white trash parents blamed it all on Judas Priest who was put on trial for years. This was hilarious and sad at the same time. Very good doc, and a comical 80's time capsule.

[HungFist]

Samurai Avenger: The Blind Wolf (USA, 2009) [DVD] – 2.5/5
Japanese-American director Kurando Mitsutake’s low budget homage to spaghetti westerns and chambara films is fun, but doesn’t quite work as a movie. The director goes overboard with honouring (copying) scenes from his favourite films, especially Lone Wolf & Cub, and inserts an overdose of flashbacks that kill the pacing. Even then, with cool soundtrack, several fun ideas, gory violence and bare skin it’s impossible not to be moderately entertained. The director’s next film, Gun Woman (2014), was thankfully a major improvement in nearly all areas.

Rome Armed to the Teeth (Italy, 1976) [DVD] – 3.5/5
1970’s Italian crime films were quite a fascinating cinematic movement not only for their ass kicking action, but for a remarkably consistent vision of a nation under the terror of mafia and street thugs. Rome Armed to the Teeth does the formula to the point of losing its storyline focus at times; violence is everywhere. As typical for the genre, the police are powerless, except for commissioner Tanzi, who leaves a trail of broken noses and dead bodies everywhere he goes. Maurizio Merli is at his best here and the soundtrack kicks ass, but the film suffers from a somewhat messy storyline and the use of fast motion in some action scenes.

Note: though original German DVD release features an English audio track, it's in very poor shape. Thanfully a far superior Italian track and English subtitles are also provided. The recent re-issue by the same company apparently loses all English options.

[Markgway]

Brain Dead (1989-USA) **½

A mindfuck movie that's intriguing throughout... but after a while of travelling in circles you realise the filmmakers haven't really thought out their plot.

[RetroRobot]

Trick or Treat- 1986

Marc Price aka Skippy from Family Ties is a heavy metal reject who is bullied by the jocks in school, untill he plays a metal record backwards containing demonic messages from his idol, the recently deceased rock star, Sammi Curr. The messages boosts his confidence to stand up to his bullies, but things get out of hand when the dead Sammi Curr comes out of the speakers as some electric demon or whatever. The film has alot of cool ideas, but they are not executed very well by director Charles Martin Smith (the nerdy agent from The Untouchables). It's fairly entertaining, but reeks of wasted potential. Also, calling this a horror movie is kind of a stretch. It's certainly not scary, and there's zero blood on display, as the Sammi Curr character kills people with electricity. Sort of enjoyable based on the 80's vibe, and a couple of fun cameos by Gene Simmons and Ozzy, but not much more than that.

[Markgway]

Last Exit to Brooklyn (1989-USA-UK-West Germany) **
Repellent slice of Brooklyn 1950s life without a single character to care about.
I expected the grit, but what threw me off guard was how camp this film was.
Provocative to be sure, but that's nowhere near enough.
Jennifer Jason Leigh excels in one of her trademark fucked-up slut roles.

Delirious (1991-USA) **
Mildly amusing farce in which concussed soap writer John Candy is trapped in the very world he created. The cast do their best, but the script is patchy and doesn't wring enough laughs out of a smart premise.

Unlawful Entry (1992-USA-Japan) **½
Slick Hollywood thriller in which a married couple are terrorized by a psycho cop. Cast is strong, but predictable script runs out of gas, long before the violent conclusion.

[RetroRobot]

Spot on assessments of all three, Mark.

[Markgway]

Spot on assessments of all three, Mark.

Thanks!

[RetroRobot]

More screencaps, and today I had the whole day so I pulled a Carpenter marathon.

Halloween- 1978

Compared to what has come out since in the genre, it is fairly tame, but still highly effective in the spooky scenes. Carpenter's sense of pacing always seems off to me, and this one is no different. Yet, it perseveres on the haunting soundtrack, the iconic figure of Michael Myers and Jamie Lee's performance.

The Fog- 1980

Even though they went back and shoot additional footage with the pirate ghosts and more killings, I still feel it needed more of that. But it is still a good ole' ghost yarn with a lot of atmosphere and excitement. The pacing is a bit off again, but that's just Carpenter's unintentional trademark I guess.

Escape From New York- 1981

Not a huge fave of mine, though it does have its bright spots. Snake Plissken is a really cool character, and the whole premise is rife with potential, but I don't think Carpenter fully lives up to that. I don't like the production design, apart from the dark streets and alleyways. The whole thing of making stuff look all old timey in the interiors was a bad decision in my opinion. I think they should have kept it dark and gritty, plus made Hayes and his gang look more menacing instead of comedic. Only Frank Doubleday has the right look here. The rest look kinda ridiculous. Oh well, it has its moments, Adrienne Barbeau's cleavage being one of them.

The Thing- 1982

My second favorite Carpenter film, and just an overall classic sci-fi horror effort, with a limited but great cast and some fantastic FX work by Rob Bottin. I love the old FX style of this era, with latex, animatronics, model shots, matte paintings and so on. It feels organic and "right there" in a way that even the most expensive CGI in the world can never do. Great film, and genuinly scary and unsettling.

Big Trouble in Little China- 1986

My fave Carpenter flick, and if someone held a gun to my head and demanded I picked only one, perhaps my fave Hollywood film of all time. I love EVERYTHING about this film. Even the stuff I don't really like, I still kinda like. The entertainment value here is shameless. Jack Burton is one of the greatest characters ever. The hero/sidekick switch is genius. The Chinese mysticism, kung fu, magic, old school FX work, horror elements, adventure feel, 80's vibe.... everything works here. It's exciting, entertaining, enjoyable, funny as hell and any other positive adjective I can come up with. It's not even close to being a perfect film, and yet still kinda is.... to me at least. When I saw this as a kid, I was blown away. Couldn't think about anything else for days. So the nostalgia factor is also weighing in here. If I had to give a clear cut example of the old tired term "movie magic", this would be the film.

[Markgway]

The Thing and Assault on Precinct 13 are my favourite Carpenter movies.

Bad Medicine (1985-USA) **
Mild comedy is short on laughs but has its heart in the right place.

Day of the Dead (1985-USA) **½
The closest we've come to an intellectual Zombie movie... but damaged by some one-note characterizations and a terrible performance by Joe Pilato (as Sgt Rhodes). Tom Savini's gore effects are outstanding (he'd come a long way since DAWN).

[HungFist]

Blue is the Warmest Colour (France, 2013) [BD] – 4/5
Excellent French drama loses some its bite during the middle third when the focus drifts from the two leading characters to their friends and family members, but improves again towards the end. Adèle Exarchopoulos is phenomenally good in the lead role, and director Abdellatif Kechiche’s natural approach is quite impressive. The much talked about sex scenes aren’t really all that much to talk about.

Rare Exports (Finland, 2010) [Love Hotel VoD] – 3/5
Basically had to re-watch this just for the experience because Finnish movie in a love hotel was such a surreal thing. A relatively fun film with great concept and good balance between family fantasy and horror, though some of the acting (the second kid, and the foreigner) and the epic child hero stuff toward the end are downright embarrassing.

Amusingly, the elves got censored in Japan, though that’s also true to all those HC rape porn film flicks the hotel offers.

[Markgway]

The Legend of Billie Jean (1985-USA) **½
Enjoyable teen rebellion movie lacks a sharp satirical edge that would make it first rate.