The off-topic topic

grim_tales · Post by **grim_tales** » 27 Sep 2005, 20:27

I havent seen Sarah in a while as my local is being redecorated/cleaned out. Not sure when it will open again (supposed to be next month).
Bah

Also I got new furniture, shelves, blinds (red instead of blue) and DVD racks (beech colored not boring military grey

) for my room now

It looks much better.

IronMonkey · Post by **IronMonkey** » 10 Oct 2005, 13:54

Markgway wrote:I don't need to take drugs to be fucked-in-the-head.

I was born that way!!

Same here mate!

I recently split up with my girlfriend for the second time (do you guys remember me talking about it in this thread about 4 months back?) and am surprised how well I'm coping with it to be honest.

I had just had enough of being used & abused so I thought to hell with it, she might be gorgeous & generally a really nice person, but she wasn't treating me well.

The first time we split up it was her that initiated it & I felt completely lost for ages.

This time it was me who said it was over & that I've finally had enough. I am surprised I'm not missing her more though. Its early days and I'm definitely not over her yet, but I feel so much more free & relaxed now.

I can do my own thing! And the most important thing - I can look at other girls without getting told off! Rachel Stevens & Elisha Cuthbert are staying on my desktop now!

I may have lost everything I've had for the past 3.5 years, but its time to move on.

I can't believe how positive I'm being about all this! Ah well, I can't live with depression forever...

I just had to get that off my chest. Thanks for listening!

grim_tales · Post by **grim_tales** » 10 Oct 2005, 14:06

Hang in there IM

You're coping better than I did (do?), all I ever do is moan when it happens to me

Mordib · Post by **Mordib** » 10 Oct 2005, 14:42

IronMonkey wrote:
I recently split up with my girlfriend for the second time (do you guys remember me talking about it in this thread about 4 months back?) and am surprised how well I'm coping with it to be honest.

It never actually gets easy but it certainly gets easier the more times it happens. it also helps when you do the dumping

m.

BiscLimpkit · Post by **BiscLimpkit** » 10 Oct 2005, 20:58

IronMonkey wrote:
I recently split up with my girlfriend for the second time (do you guys remember me talking about it in this thread about 4 months back?) and am surprised how well I'm coping with it to be honest.

I had just had enough of being used & abused so I thought to hell with it, she might be gorgeous & generally a really nice person, but she wasn't treating me well.

The first time we split up it was her that initiated it & I felt completely lost for ages.

This time it was me who said it was over & that I've finally had enough. I am surprised I'm not missing her more though. Its early days and I'm definitely not over her yet, but I feel so much more free & relaxed now.

I can do my own thing! And the most important thing - I can look at other girls without getting told off! Rachel Stevens & Elisha Cuthbert are staying on my desktop now!

I may have lost everything I've had for the past 3.5 years, but its time to move on.

I can't believe how positive I'm being about all this! Ah well, I can't live with depression forever...

I just had to get that off my chest. Thanks for listening!

Weren't you going out with a really hot Chinese girl? She's the one not treating you well?

PS: I'm sorry that you guys split up but glad to hear that you're handling it well.

IronMonkey · Post by **IronMonkey** » 10 Oct 2005, 21:27

Mordib wrote:It never actually gets easy but it certainly gets easier the more times it happens. it also helps when you do the dumping

Well, it wasn't exactly like that. It was kind of mutual, but more on my part. I'd just had enough...

BiscLimpKit wrote:Weren't you going out with a really hot Chinese girl? She's the one not treating you well?

PS: I'm sorry that you guys split up but glad to hear that you're handling it well.

Yeah, she's Chinese and she's really hot!

But she took me for granted, always expecting me to do everything for her and she never so much as even whispered a "thank you" to me.

We had been together for just under 3.5 years when we split up. When we'd been together for about 6 months, I was still quite good mates with an ex-girlfriend of mine, and my hot Chinese girlfriend got so jealous of that, so she made me chose between her and my ex. Well I didn't want to have to chose either but I didn't want to lose my girlfriend so I chose her.

When we went on a "break" a few months back, she got together with one of my mates & started seeing him. When we got back together she still kept in contact with him & talked about him all the time, which really was annoying as hell. It was like she was rubbing my face in it.

So it was a case of "the shoe on the other foot". I asked her that if she could only have me in her life by staying away from the other lad, would she do it? And she said no, she wouldn't.

That sealed it for me. I deserve better than that!

Its sad because despite her little annoyances (and I know I have them too, we all have) I still love her & I'll miss her for what will feel like forever. I made the decision to say I would stay away completely & she would not see me anymore, to make it easier for me to leave.

I guess its been easier than our last split because I was expecting it coming this time...

So here I am, single and free!

Yi-Long · Post by **Yi-Long** » 10 Oct 2005, 22:03

Things in my relationship are also a bit bumpy at the moment. We used to be pretty much best friends but lately she's nagging too much. Usually I just go into Yuddi (Days of being Wild) mode and just shut off to her, kinda ignoring her etc...

I'm getting kinda sick and tired of all the arguments about nothing, but we do still love eachother and whenever the argument is over she is all sweet again and scared I might break up with her.

I'm not sure how it will go on, or if it will end. I love her to death when she acts normal, but when she's acting up I could piledrive her from an 8-story building...

Women...(!)

Ah well... luckily it's nothing with other boys or girls or whatever in the picture.

IronMonkey · Post by **IronMonkey** » 10 Oct 2005, 22:41

Yi-Long wrote:We used to be pretty much best friends but lately she's nagging too much.

I'm getting kinda sick and tired of all the arguments about nothing, but we do still love eachother.

I love her to death when she acts normal, but when she's acting up I could piledrive her from an 8-story building...

Women...(!)

That's exactly how I felt in my relationship. That's why its so hard to walk away for me. I've not only lost the girl I love most, but she was my best friend too.

That's why I've had to have a clean break; I couldn't cope with seeing her or talking to her - knowing she's still around is hard enough but having to see her would make things a million times worse.

When I went to the councellor the first time we split (I really didn't handle it well - I was & still am trying to cope with over 5 years of depression), she said breaking up with someone you have such a connection to is worse than if that person had died.

At least with a death you can have closure, knowing that's it & you'll never see that person again. But with a breakup, it just means you will eventually see that person again...

Yi-Long · Post by **Yi-Long** » 11 Oct 2005, 00:26

Yeah, I can imagine. As most of you know I've also had a depression, which luckily is going better the last few years, but I do feel that if I'd lose this girl, who is pretty much basically the one person for who I still try to do my best, it could all go down again. But ofcourse, sometimes I also long back to that time when I didnt really have to worry about tomorrow as I basically didnt care much about a future anyway...

It's very hard for me to imagine a life without my current girlfriend, yet sometimes I fantasize about it, as she can be a huge nag lately, and I'm a private person who doesnt really wanna chit-chat about the small stuff and all (and she apparently does...which is boring as shite). So anything is possible at this point, but we'll see how she behaves in the coming weeks/months, and if we do break up, it will be interesting to see where it will lead me. I don't think a break-up would do either of us any good though... so I'm hoping for the best, that things will turn around to the way they were.

It's good to see you taken the break-up pretty good. I can't really imagine your situation as your girl was obviously very different then my girl, as in she didnt take into account your feelings and seems to have been a bit egotistical (??), so personally I can't really understand why you would consider such a person a close friend, let alone a partner. But obviously you did so it's a very big loss to you.

BTW, did you kinda feel a responsibilty to stick with this relationship out of respect for the friendly relationship you had with the other girl, that you had to break off!? Cause that was pretty much my idea, whenever things between my girl and me were going bad, I would just think of the girl I had to give up for her, and that would make me work harder to make this relationship work, or else it would have been even worse to have lost the other girl over a doomed relationship. So out of respect for the girl I had to hurt to be with my current girlfriend, I owe it to us both to at least treat this relationship with the utmost respect and care, or else I would have hurt the girl for nothing...

I wish women had the gift of logical thoughts.

grim_tales · Post by **grim_tales** » 11 Oct 2005, 08:50

Yeah.
I guess I'd been rejected (kind of) but I didnt even know it happened

(I still maintain my feelings were platonic, that doesnt mean I didnt feel anything for her).

Bah

Mordib · Post by **Mordib** » 11 Oct 2005, 09:35

hot chicks require attention. unless you are hotter... unfortunately one person in the relationship will always have to be working to keep the other... not that im cynical or anything

IronMonkey · Post by **IronMonkey** » 11 Oct 2005, 09:45

So true Mordib. I might post a small photo of us from a few years ago when we were happy when I get home from work tonight so you can judge for yourselves how fine she was...

It won't stay up long though!

Markgway · Post by **Markgway** » 11 Oct 2005, 16:17

We had been together for just under 3.5 years when we split up. When we'd been together for about 6 months, I was still quite good mates with an ex-girlfriend of mine, and my hot Chinese girlfriend got so jealous of that, so she made me chose between her and my ex. Well I didn't want to have to chose either but I didn't want to lose my girlfriend so I chose her.

...and that signalled the end of your relationship. Once you give in to a jealous whim you're toast. She'll know she can get what she wants by demand and threat. If you had said "No, I won't lose my friend over you" things might have turned out different. She may have be pissed, but probably would have respected you for it, and learnt you can't be pushed around. If I've learnt one lesson in life it's this: People WILL disappoint you. Fact. No matter how much you like/love/respect/care for them they will hurt you in one way or another. It's sad, but true. Trick is not to get crushed by it, but to have the strength to move on, like Iron Monkey finally seems to be doing.

grim_tales · Post by **grim_tales** » 12 Oct 2005, 12:22

Gah.. I'll never understand women

I started too late..

BiscLimpkit · Post by **BiscLimpkit** » 12 Oct 2005, 18:19

IronMonkey wrote: It won't stay up long though!

Oh I dunno man... I can make mine stay up for quite a while, if you know what I'm talkin about. :jerk:

grim_tales · Post by **grim_tales** » 13 Oct 2005, 20:50

Steptoe voice: You dirty old man Bisc.

BiscLimpkit · Post by **BiscLimpkit** » 15 Oct 2005, 10:47

So what's everyone up to this weekend?

I'm going to a casino... for the first time.

I'm prepared to lose a maximum of £5.

IronMonkey · Post by **IronMonkey** » 15 Oct 2005, 11:01

I was going to ask this girl I like out, but I chickened out!

So I'll just have to go to the pub with my mates! (no alcohol of course!)

grim_tales · Post by **grim_tales** » 15 Oct 2005, 11:13

How come?

IronMonkey · Post by **IronMonkey** » 15 Oct 2005, 11:15

How come what?

grim_tales · Post by **grim_tales** » 15 Oct 2005, 11:25

How come no alcohol? Fair play you dont "need" beer to have a good time, you just made it sound like you aren't allowed it or something

IronMonkey · Post by **IronMonkey** » 15 Oct 2005, 11:40

Well... I'm not!

grim_tales · Post by **grim_tales** » 15 Oct 2005, 12:04

IronMonkey · Post by **IronMonkey** » 15 Oct 2005, 12:51

Has that cleared everything up for you?!

BiscLimpkit · Post by **BiscLimpkit** » 15 Oct 2005, 13:31

No I still don't understand one thing.

How hot is this new girl that you couldn't ask out?