English-Language Martial Arts B-Movies

[Killer Meteor]

The ultimate proof of Robert Clouse's incompetence is that Rosalind Chao does not a close-up in Battle Creek Brawl!

[Markgway]

Rosalind Chao became well known for her recurring role on Star Trek: NG and then DS9.

Never watched any of the STAR TREK TV series. Nice to know she was still in work. If she'd have moved to HK she could've been a star I reckon.

[saltysam]

I quite liked An Eye For An Eye.i have the aussie dvd.always wondered why all dvd versions omit the nude shower scene with Chuck & Maggie Cooper.think it's only ever been in the pre-cert embassy vhs.

[Markgway]

always wondered why all dvd versions omit the nude shower scene with Chuck & Maggie Cooper.think it's only ever been in the pre-cert embassy vhs.

WTF?? I had no idea. Pity I missed out on some T&A. I hope we're spared Chuck's arse?

[saltysam]

WTF?? I had no idea. Pity I missed out on some T&A. I hope we're spared Chuck's arse?

Yeah it's Maggie that gets naked the scene sticks in my memory cause Maggie Cooper in the movie was pretty prim and proper and it was quite a surprise to see her disrobe with gay abandon and join Chuck in the shower! Just curious why the sequence seems to have vanished over the years.

[Markgway]

I NEED TO SEE THIS!!

[Markgway]

Not sure if this REALLY qualifies as a martial arts movie? It's borderline.

The Punisher **.5 Australian-made film adaptation of the Marvel comic as vehicle for fresh from He-Man Dolph Lundgren. Good actors, some decent dialogue, but the film feels unfinished. Post-production cuts obviously haven't helped, although how useful the Frank Castle backstory would be I'm not sure as I haven't seen all of the workprint. The direction is competant, but the action pedestrian. Loads of violence (especially in the Unrated cut), but not particularly stylish, and it becomes a bit numbing after a while. Dolph fits the part like a glove, but his character is too humourless and unappealing. He seems to think he's in a dark drama rather than a comic book. Negatives aside - it's worth a watch (and apparently much better than the remake)

[Markgway]

Kickboxer III - The Art of War **.5 A definite improvement over Part 2 with a new locale (Rio) and better plot - Sloan and Xian come to the aid of a couple of young street urchins exploited by a kickboxing promoter cum slave master. Sasha Mitchell comes from the Keanu Reeves school of acting and his reflective character of Part 2 has become a kind of surfer dude with brightly coloured clothing. His fighting skills have improved, however, and that makes a difference in the action sequences (the action in Part 2 was very poor). The plot doesn't make much sense, but the film is fun for what it is.

[EvaUnit02]

Kickboxer 4 with Mark Dacascos had great choreography IIRC.

As for KB3, I couldn't take it seriously, since it starred Cousin Cody from Step by Step.

[Markgway]

Kickboxer 4 with Mark Dacascos had great choreography IIRC.

That was Kickboxer 5 - Redemption.

Part 4 also starred Sasha Mitchell and was frankly shit - the worst of the series by a mile.

As for KB3, I couldn't take it seriously, since it starred Cousin Cody from Step by Step.

Lol. He gives the same performance. Not a film to be taken seriously at any rate.

[Markgway]

To Be the Best *.5 Dopey fight film about a bunch of unlikeable Americans taking on a bunch of unlikeable Thais in a Las Vegas kickboxing tournament. A crooked gambler (with annoying Texan accent) holds one fighter's dumb girlfriend as hostage to make him throw the fight. Martin Kove plays an alcoholic coach - I hope for his sake that was real booze in the bottle. In the ring action is acceptable - but looks more like full contact to me. Some scenes filmed in The Sands hotel - yet their ring looks supiciously small and underlit.

American Yakuza **.5 Not bad thriller with undercover FBI agent Viggo Mortensen infiltrating the Yakuza. Hampered a bit by it's B-movie limitations but better than much of the dross that you'll find on your bottom shelf with the words American and Yakuza in them. Acting is good, enough bloodletting to satisfy fans of swords and uzis. Didn't recognise the main Japanese actor but he was fine. Robert Forster co-stars as Viggo's boss.

[Shingster]

Didn't recognise the main Japanese actor but he was fine.

Ryo Ishibashi, great actor.

[Markgway]

Chain of Command ***

One the last Cannon movies to be made (in 1993). An enjoyable vehicle for Michael Dudikoff in which he plays an ex-forces oil worker who discovers his company plans to scupper a peace agreement between an Arab country and Israel for their own nefarious ends - and gets shot at A LOT. Dudikoff gets to drink, smoke, shag, and swear quite a bit, and seems to be having a lot of fun doing so. He's actually quite charismatic. R. Lee Ermey is terrific as the oil boss, and has good dialogue scenes with Dudikoff, and the main baddie thug has a hilarious haircut (think 17th century Cavalier) that's hopefully intended to be as funny as it is. He sneers when running a knife over a hot girl's nipples. Just before "The Dude" kicks the shit out of him. Bravo.

[Markgway]

Missing in Action **.5 Filmed as a sequel, but released first, MIA is a comic book fantasy in which one-man army Chuck Norris invades Vietnam and saves surprisingly few American POWs. There's lots of shooting, a few explosions, but little of the human drama that makes Parts 2 and 3 superior movies. It's fun in a suspend-disbelief sort of way but Chuck is so untouchable here that you'd imagine a rocket would bounce right off him. Just as daft as Rambo 2. But is it better? I'm not sure.

The Shepherd ** Strictly average DTV fodder starring a tired-looking Van Damme who doesn't appear terribly interested - and with a script this poor who can blame him? The action has its moments, but doesn't really live up to the Florentine-Perry hype I've been hearing about. As is all-too-common in modern movies the photography is too damn dark. These DPs could learn something from the old timers. It's amusing to see a Scots actress cast as a Mexican-American border guard - but that's about it for novelty value. If Van Damme wants back into cinemas he'll have to do better than this.

[Shingster]

How badly underused was Scott Adkins in The Shepherd! He's clearly a better screen fighter than Van Damme ever was, but they give him about 4 kicks and a brief tussle with VD at the end!

Adkins is the lead in Florentine's next film: Ninja, so hopefully that will be a better exhibition of his skills, but tbh on the strength of The Shepherd I've got to say that Florentine is not a good director at all. He's competent when it comes to directing action, but he has no fucking clue how to build a narrative or get convincing performances from his actors.

[Markgway]

Was surprised that Adkins got second billing since he was in the film less (or at least had less to say and do) than Stephen Lord and Natalie Robb. The final showdown was too short, not ambitious enough. I know Van Damme was 46 when this was shot, but I think he's in good enough shape to handle something more challenging. No one would mind if he was doubled for more acrobatic moves, but his trademark kicks needed more of a workout. The few that he did were decent.

[Markgway]

The Cutter ** Chuck Norris returns from CBS-land to DTV-land for this average time-killer about an ex-cop tracking down an old Jewish diamond cutter. It looks and feels like a slightly more violent than average TV movie, with some flashy MTV style camera and editing tricks thrown in to try to disguise how pedestrian it is. I like Norris, but at 65 (his age when this was filmed) his action days were over. The holocaust supblot is a bit different, and supporting actors for once weren't bad. But that's not enough reason to go out of your way to catch this.

[Markgway]

Rage of Honor ** More Sho Kosugi Ninja action. Well-produced, but just as dim as usual. Sho plays a DEA agent who quits his job and flies to Buenos Airies to slaughter the smarmy scumbag who killed his partner - taking his girlfriend along probably wasn't the brightest of ideas now was it? Packed with fights, violence, and cool weapons, but otherwise this is lazy filmmaking. You know what to expect.

[saltysam]

Shootfighter is currently in Poundland stores.

[Markgway]

Should be uncut too.