Bullets 'n' Babes

Riot (2015-USA) **½
Matthew Reese (me neither...) produces and stars in this not bad DTV martial arts actioner set in a futuristic prison; Dolph Lundgren is pretty good in a co-starring role. For what it is, I can't complain. Best enjoyed late on a Friday night.

The Good, The Bad and The Ugly: 5/5

Stone cold classic film, seen on a cinema screen. Apparently the 4K restored version was used but at times it seemed like they just slapped the actual BD onto the screen - in certain scenes it looked far too smooth as if the actors were placed against a green screen (like the part when Tuco tries to hang Blondie in his room) - just weird and wrong. Other times it looked more film (if rather yellow) like which was better.
I wish they'd shown a real film print though, as befitting of a cinema. I didnt mind the extra scenes as such but the dubbing is jarring as hell on the big screen.
The music is fucking amazing as ever, especially the Mexican stand-off in the graveyard

35mm screenings are now as rare as hen's teeth.

Gold (1974-UK) **½
Not bad disaster drama with Roger Moore struggling to shake off the Bond image.

The Pink Panther (1963-USA) ***
Funny French farce, before the series morphed into larger-than-life slapstick vehicles.

Lone Survivor (2013-USA) ***
Exciting, violent action thriller, based on a true story.
Director Peter Berg knows how to sustain tension, despite the title (and pre-credit sequence) giving everything away.
It's ironic that the sole survivor is the one most responsible for his colleagues' deaths.

Blazing Saddles: 4/5

Entertaining spoof Western that probably wouldnt be made today (at least not in the same manner). Very funny in places, Gene Wilder was a great comic talent.

Brainscan (1994-Canada-USA-UK) **
Mindfuck horror; Imaginative premise given slightly shoddy treatment.

Cannibal Ferox (Italy, 1981) [DVD] - 3/5
Incredibly violent cannibal film is nevertheless in some ways easier to watch than many modern gore movies. The big difference is that this one takes places almost entirely in daylight and is essentially an adventure film with some atmospheric, even beautiful moments. It is not, however, on par with Deodato's films, and obviously cannot be recommended to anyone except those with an appetite for ultra-strong cannibal adventures. The violence is extreme and I closed my eyes quite a few times, and not only during the unfortunate animal killings.

Jason Bourne: 3/5

Started off rather slow, but I thought it was okay. One main problem is that, especially in the first half, the film keeps cutting back and forth between what Bourne/other characters are doing and the people in the CIA room, so there's lots of "He's turning left. copy that" etc, and then we see exactly whats been said play out. This disrupts the flow of action and really reduces tension imo. Matt Damon seemed to phone his performance in, to be honest. The film seemed to be less about Bourne and more about the people tracking him at that point, which is less interesting.
The 2nd half improves though but I still didnt like the way the action was shot, too close so its difficult to see what's going on. One theme - of internet freedom v snooping (under the guise of protection/privacy) is hardly transparent.
Whether this is the final Bourne film, who knows?

The Usual Suspects (1995-USA-UK-Germany) ***
Complex, well-crafted crime thriller; first-rate ensemble cast.

Jimmy Hollywood (1994-USA) **½
A forty-something, wannabe actor, soured by the absence of the mythical Golden Age, adopts a vigilante guise.
Barry Levinson's mecca of dreams satire is almost a really good movie; definitely worth a look for Joe Pesci fans.

Commando Leopard (1985-Italy-Germany-Switzerland) **
Guerrilla leader Lewis Collins takes on a Banana Republic dictatorship in Antonio Margheritti's bearable, though unsophisticated nuts and bolts actioner. Silver-mopped Klaus Kinski plays a nasty militia commander.

Puncture Wounds aka A Certain Justice (2013-USA) **
Iraq war veteran Cung Le goes after all-purpose scumbag Dolph Lundgren after his family is burnt to death.
Pretty nasty, but pretty OK for shot on digital DTV fodder.

Codename: Wildgeese (1984-Italy-Germany) **
Commando leader Lewis Collins takes on Golden Triangle dope manufacturers in Antonio Margheritti's bearable, though unsophisticated nuts and bolts actioner. Silver-mopped Klaus Kinski plays a nasty military commander.

Can't Come Out to Play (2013-USA) **½
Psychological thriller is quietly effective, but a few gaps in logic detract.
Samantha Morton is a scary mother...

Lights Out 2/5
Recent low budget USA spook tale was a big hit,the yanks lap up these movies,especially if James Wan's name is involved.it's ok,a couple of jumps,not one i'd be in a hurry to revisit.
Thor The Dark World 3/5
loud,bombastic but entertaining Marvel film.
Where's Poppa 2.5/5
Very black 1970 comedy is so unpc i don't think it'd get made today,it'd certainly be watered down.George Segal plays the put upon son of Ruth Gordon who's looking for a way to get rid of her.While a lot of this is dated some of it is still pretty funny.
The Wolfman 2.5/5
Universal horror is a little dull but has some nice atmosphere.Lon Chaney jr in his signature role.

Ruby Sparks (2012-USA) **½
Paul Dano suffers writer's block, brings his dream girl (MVP Zoe Kazan, who also wrote the script) into reality.
Smart comedy-drama has much to admire, but never quite exploits the comedic value of its whimsical premise.

Force of Execution (2013-USA) *½
Portly whisperer Steven Seagal (dubbed on occasion) and a slumming Ving Rhames play rival scumbags warring over drug territory. Depressingly seedy, unpleasantly violent (I keep going on about it, but today's '15's would've been '18's with cuts 20 years ago). Force of excrement.

Portly whisperer, nice one. I also like chubby chunterer or the mammoth mumbler

Gargantuan garbler, perhaps?

A Low Down Dirty Shame (1994-USA) **
Just OK action vehicle for comic Keenen Ivory Wayans, here playing a private eye, actually named Shame(!).
Jada Pinkett is teeth-scrapingly irritating as a loud black woman stereotype (that's supposed to be cute).

Gargantuan garbler sounds like his porn name!

You're thinking of Gargantuan Gobbler!

Semen Seagal: The Gargantuan Gobbler. I reckon he'd have a larger viewer base doing that than these shitty DTV flicks! Has that Above the Law sequel gone into production yet? They might have that out by January!

I just hope there's a foot chase...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nkskuSXqUD0

China Moon (1991-USA) **½
Engrossing neo-noir with police detective Ed Harris (very good) falling for battered wife Madeline Stowe (very gorgeous).
There's a twist - isn't there always? - but the more I think about it, the less convinced I am.

Yeah I've seen clips of Seagal running before, wtf is up with that? I actually think part of the reason he put so much weight on is because he's too ashamed to go jogging! Funnily enough I did a lot of googling on Seagal stories online and on YouTube the other week, he's so far up his own arse that just about every story of him being a dick either at parties or on set do not disappoint!

Yeah, I think Seagal is one of those stars who's as bad as his reputation suggests...

L.A. Confidential (USA, 1997) [DVD] - 4/5
Excellent, very well acted film slightly suffers from a storyline that tries to tie too many loose ends during the last 25 minutes. I didn't quite buy it how a certain bad guy decided to do the dirty work by himself in the climax. Otherwise a very solid film (the first 30 min is fantastic). I had forgotten what a great actor Russell Crowe was back then.